Write everyday

June Goals: Inner Reset & Creative Output

HOW is it June already?!

Seriously, wasn’t it just New Year’s? How are we almost halfway through this year? DAMN, time’s a flyin’.

So, I had a birthday last month, and every year around my birthday, I spend a little time doing a bit of a personal evaluation and reset. Goals, some personal assessment, just basically a little check-in where I spend a little time evaluating where I’m at and where I want to go.

I didn’t really do that this year in the same way I have in years past. I mean, I thought about it, but I didn’t really take the time to be alone and do the real reflecting I want. Well, since that’s sort of an arbitrary goal I set without any real deadline, I’ve decided that I’m going to spend time in June doing the reset I usually do in May.

Spiritual reset, emotional reset, physical reset. I have a lot of things I want to accomplish in the second half of this year, and I think before I do, the best plan I can lay is to give myself a strong foundation. That comes from a little bit of reflection, some honest assessment, and then some specific goal-setting.

I’ll share all of my June goals once I’ve formulated them, but here are the first two:

  1. Publish something every day. This can be a blog post, but it could also be Instagram. It could be a video or something else. But I will create and share something (even small) every day for the full month of June.
  2. Take a break from drinking. Starting Monday, I’m going to take a [near] month off from consuming any alcohol as a way to reset myself from the inside out. I’ve taken short breaks here and there, but never a month, and never with the intent to do some other inner work as well.

Those may remain my only two June goals, but I like working in 3’s, so I’ll likely add a third, something tangible that will show progress moving forward in my business.

Speaking of my business, I’ll be officially launching it soon (August-September), but in the meantime, there are two ways I’m currently working with clients:

  • One-on-one coaching, in a 6-month program
  • One-on-one coaching, in a single-session, Get Yourself Unstuck little creative jam

If you’re interested in either of those, let me know! There will be more information about all of it soon :)

sparkle firework

Writing Without Direction, The Half[Assed]30, and Titles So Long and Irrelevant I’m Clearly Not Concerned About SEO or Whatever

I miss writing. I miss blogging, I miss the community, and I miss the opportunities.

Yet, something has happened in my brain in the past couple of years as I moved away from Putting My Opinions & Feelings On The Internet that have made me increasingly terrified of starting back up with any real meaning.

Imposter Syndrome

I want to write about food and cocktails, and yet a year into working in a fine dining bar and restaurant, and I’m plagued with Imposter Syndrome. You know. “Who am I to write about food when I’m such the rookie here?” Those types of thoughts.

Supportive friends remind me that my knowledge, while less than my mentors is still greater than others, and those Others will benefit from what I can share.

And yet, paralysis.

My Stories Are Your Stories

I hesitate to share my own personal stories as I’m increasingly sensitive to the privacy of other people. Man, you fuck that one up once or twice and you’ll get (rightfully) gun-shy about ever sharing anyone’s personal information ever again. For that reason, when *my* stories are also *their* stories, I’ve started playing those a bit more close-lipped (often times at the expense of sometimes feeling like I’m sorting through things on my own).

But, the truth remains, I miss this space and the people that used to hang out here, so I’m going to test the waters of new content and ideas.

No Direction

I don’t have a content plan. I don’t give a single fuck about SEO (or language for that matter, apparently. #sorrymom), and the only thing about design I’m concerned with right now is that there are lots of pretty pictures (because my life is beautiful, really).

perspective

I know I said months ago that I was coming back, and I meant to, but then life and well, you know. Things happened. Today I’m just putting it out there that I’m a little nervous about it, but that I’m tired of letting that get in the way.

blossom-quote-anais-ninThe #Half[Assed]30

Have you heard of the Whole30? It’s this program based on a couple of books that challenges people who want to hit the reset button on their health to cut out all of the bad stuff for a month. The idea is that this helps break addictions to sugar, grain, alcohol, processed foods, and other bad habits.

I’m not doing it.

I’ve done cleanses before of varying lengths of time, and I understand their benefits. I’ve given up sugar and grains and alcohol and caffeine, and I get it. These days, I work in a restaurant with British Isles influence and Pacific Northwest ingredients. We have access to some amazingly fresh meat, seafood, and produce, as well as an entire community committed to eating, drinking, and living well.

I’m a part of it, and I love it.

hot dog

However, it’s safe to say that I have been over-indulging lately, going beyond a simple appreciation for great food and cocktails and following hedonistic, in-the-moment, discipline-free whims.

I’d like to strike a balance between those two extremes, so I’ve been checking out some of the principles and tools surrounding the Whole30 as an inspiration and reminder of how best to eat. My at-home habits need a reset, so I’m going to focus on that while keeping my approach to enjoying Portland’s dining scene open-minded and relaxed.

If I come across a new cooking technique, teach myself something, or come up with something that works for me, I’ll share it. But this is not a healthy eating blog, and this is not a blog of gluttony. I know I don’t have to explain that, but having covered (or tried to cover) both ends of that pendulum swing over the past decade or so of blogging (food-related or otherwise), I figured I’d just admit that I’m just striving for balance between health and hedonism.

radishes

This isn’t a feelings blog, but I have many, so they’ll show up. It’s not a drink blog, but I’m bartending and working in a restaurant, so I’ll cover it. It’s not a Portland or Pacific Northwest-only blog but I live loudly and love deeply here, so the influence of this beloved region on my adventures and writing will be prevalent, and possibly even annoying. I won’t do much proof-reading or editing, save for spell-check and just making sure things make sense. I’m giving myself permission to just exist here and let that take whatever shape it does, rather than corner myself into something I’ll only end up quitting later because it wasn’t quite right.

That’s where I am. Maybe no one’s here anymore, or maybe you never left. Either way, I’m a little gun-shy, but I’m back. I promise nothing*.

*Except maybe a bunch of Instagram photos of my food, Portland’s beautiful summers, and lots and lots of cocktails. That, I am confident I can deliver.