My Next Big Move

I’m antsy.  Always.  I’ve never had an easy time with that whole idea of “being present.”  Nope, I’m one of those people with big! dreams! always looking towards the future, daydreaming about the month I’m going to spend in Costa Rica, the summer I’m going to spend in Europe, the extended amount of time I’m going to spend in Australia and the South Pacific.  I make Life Lists, draw diagrams, get out my big dry erase board and funky-colored markers and start flow-charting my way to my next big thing.

An adventurer’s heart

A couple of weeks ago, I was feeling antsier than normal.  Restless, bright-eyed, and confident that NOW! was my time to take on the world.  My jobs keep me mobile, which is exactly what I was going for, and I started cringing when I realized how much stuff I’d acquired since moving to Boulder when I made such a massive effort to simplify and purge when I left Minneapolis.

What am I doing? Building a LIFE here?

Oh. Wait.

And then I sort of stepped back and realized what was going on around me.  That I am doing exactly what I set out to do.  I set out to build a freelance life that was mobile and would allow me to move around and spend time exploring cities I want to fall further in love with.  I’ve just scratched the surface here in Boulder, hell, Colorado in general.

I am IN my dream right now.  I am living the goals I set for myself last year.  No, I’m not in a hammock on a beach in Costa Rica (yet) or drinking my way through Italy (yet), but I’m running away for weekend trips in the mountains with new girlfriends that feel like old girlfriends, I’m thriving in a community that not only feeds my geek side, but nurtures me through a beautiful yoga community and the perfect playground for so much delicious outdoor activity it’s a wonder I’m not already always sunburned.

I had all these thoughts about where I was now and what should come next, and naturally brought them with me onto my mat.  The absolute first thing we do is start in child’s pose, bring awareness to our breath and our bodies to be present in the moment we’re in, in the class, in each posture and each movement.

And then I read John‘s post about settling into his ex-pat life in Ireland.  We left Minnesota within a few months of each other – him to take up residence in Ireland, me to come to Colorado.  It’s been awesome to follow his journey overseas as he grows into a new culture, and we cheer each other on from time to time – check him out, he’s a great storyteller and is doing some really interesting things!

Tadasana

So somewhere in mountain pose I opened up and truly embraced Boulder as my home, not forever, but for now.  And now is this moment and tomorrow and indefinitely until I know in my heart that it’s time to move on.  But that time?  Is not even close to soon.  I will absolutely keep taking my weekend trips because, well, that’s just awesome.

Every single day something or someone awesome happens, opportunities arise, lessons are learned, and I live one more day in the life that I defined and created for myself.

I mean, let’s just revel in that for a moment, shall we?

So my next big move?  Is stillness.

Tagged as: Boulder, location independent, Yoga